The Ick

has arrived.
I took pictures of C. but they won't load. Poor kid has been on the couch literally not vertical since Sat night. Fever is back. He is having coughing fits that he can't catch his breath. His nose is raw. [he was begging for Puffs lotion tissues instead of Daddy's cheap tissues today!]Poor thing. He started crying tonight so he even let me cuddle him a bit, it calmed him down and he could sleep. I feel so helpless. Called the pediatrician for a stronger cough suppressant esp. for night-time so we are not again up at 3 am....but they have to see him. So guess we will be headed there tomorrow. See what happens tonight. Tomorrow will be day three of no school and day five of not feeling well. Poor kid has a birthday and crashes big time. He hasn't even touched the second Lego set he got Friday. I KNOW he is sick. We have been out for more cough medicine, more decongestant, and a Vick's vaporizer humidifier menthol thing that plugs in the outlet. It has literally been so long since anyone in this house has been this sick, that we don't even have anything here to take care of it! I couldn't tell you when one of us took an antibiotic last. What a blessing! But it doesn't make this any better. My baby is down and out. So home again with him tomorrow. Hopefully get out of the house to walk with a friend{{Hi A.!}} tomorrow when J. gets home from work. If anyone is going to get this it is going to be me - I have been in the face of his coughs for four days, although I have been making him manage his own tissues (two whole boxes worth) and using a TON of hand sanitizer. K has been keeping a wide berth and J. comes in contact as little as possible. Just praying my immune system can kick this thing. Also praying for C to kick it real soon. He is possibly facing being out of school this entire week.

Letting out some breath

I think we have all been subconciously holding our breath.....J. has been sworn off looking at K's grades on Parent Portal for weeks now. He just obsesses, and does nothing but wave them in K's face daily. So I forbid him to do it any longer, about a month ago I guess. But with her success in science yesterday - we couldnt' resist looking while printing out some homework assignments. I can not describe to you, unless you have ever experienced it yourself, the tension - and unconcious breath holding you do as you wait for those pages to load. You can't help it. It is palpable from K. She wants to do so well, and has given such effort without reward for years. I am not a superstitious person, I believe in prayer not karma, but almost do not want to even say this outloud for fear I am wrong and there are some sort of karma gods, who will smite me for "bragging" - but this deserves to be in print - for the first time since entering Jr High school ( 6 report cards ago) my daughter has a C average or better in all of her classes. This is HUGE. A light in our tunnel. To see the pride on her face last night just made my day. J. has now decided going out to dinner is in order. yay. I will take that reward too! ::smile:::

PS - did not forget the Franklin Inst. Will load those pictures and right about it tomorrow - oh yeah, today - C. is sick and we are up - but I am too pooped right now to think about it...Altho I will tell you I did learn and am embarrassed to admit I did not remember from the original SW in the 70's (gee how could I forget that was only yesterday!?) that the Millenium Falcon was the ship of the infamous Han Solo....duh. "How can you not know that mo-om?"

Finally

As I share here often, K struggles in school. ADD + major anxiety = extreme difficulty maintaining focus and learning. She struggles every day usually just to get the courage to go to school. The kid amazes me really. She does it. Every day. And keeps trying. To see her make the gains she has made in the last year with her therapy have been amazing, but she still has a ways to go and was/is still not seeing as much success as her effort would dictate. To constantly hear, and be told that you are smart enough to do better is so hard. Well - there was a science test and a social studies test over a week ago - got the science back today 60/60 - yes 100% (after a D on both of the previous tests) The look on her face is priceless. And she even forgot to tell me til I asked! We are not out of the woods yet, but there is light shining through the trees. The therapist feels having some success will start to open her up a little and make her less anxious.....so please pray with me that this is the start of something big. And in the meantime we will celebrate each little success along that way. The jury is still out on Social Studies - if she did well on that one, you may here a hoop and a holler whereever it is you may be. And I do believe we have successfully crossed midterm with no "your child is almost failing" letters (standard practice) home from school.

But today - is a good day.

No title

Came up blank for a witty attention grabbing title for this post. It is a fly by - just had to get this quote down....my baby's birthday - heading to Franklin Inst. - but read this and wanted to remember it. No credit was given to the author...

It takes a lot of rain to make the grass green.

There are days I think my grass should be really really high by now, then I am sobered by the thought that there are many many others that get way more rain in thier lives than I do - and am humbled. Hard to remember often. But oh so true. Every now and then it helps to look out from under our own tiny little rain cloud over our head, and notice that there are others with larger clouds, than may include thunder and lightening today. Sometimes the most blessed times in my life are when I step out from under my tiny rain cloud to join somene under thier larger cloud to give them a hug and support. Sure makes my little cloud seem insignificant. I know there will be times when my cloud is huge and thundering and I know there will be someone in my life who will join me under my cloud, hopefully with an umbrella and encourage me with emotional golashes. If not, God will always be there with a rain coat to help me get through. That I know with every ounce of my being.

I wonder, why is it do easy for us to wallow under our rain clouds, but so difficult at times to dance when the sun shines on us?

Today I chose to dance.

To DIE for

Courtesy of the Pioneer Woman

(www.thepioneerwoman.com)

Apple Dumplings

I am not a huge fan of apple pie. But J and K are. And these looked divine and super super easy.

So K and I made them the other night.

OH MY GOSH.

You have got to make them.

Today.

Now.

They are super super yummy. Weird ingredients. But the apples get so soft they simple blend with the cresents, and sauce is sweet but not over sweet and sticky....this *little* family of four polished off 12 of these little suckers in ONE sitting. The other four went to work with J the next day cause if they stayed here, I would have eaten them.

Apple Dumplings
2 Granny Smith apples

2 cans crescent rolls

2 sticks butter

1 1/2 cups sugar

1 teaspoons vanilla

cinnamon

1 small can Mountain Dew(I used half a bottle)
Peel and core apples. Cut apples into 8 slices each. Roll each apple slice in a crescent roll. Place in a 9 x 13 buttered pan. Melt butter, then add sugar and barely stir. Add vanilla, stir, and pour over apples. Pour Mountain Dew around the edges of the pan. Sprinkle with cinnamon and bake at 350 degrees for 40 minutes. Serve with ice cream, and spoon some of the sweet sauces from the pan over the top.

You're welcome.

This and that

Here is some Star Wars goodness to keep us happy until we go Friday. My dude has always been a huge fan of Lego's - and building things - so what could be better than combining that with a Star Wars obsession!? I can not believe how quickly he puts these things together. Since he doesn't read this I can tell that he is getting a HUGE set on Friday for his birthday.

Hmm...other news....got some blood work results back today - seems I need to start being a better behaved "healthy eater" - while my blood sugar is good, and trigylcerides were fine - thankfull that typically means no syndrome X or prediabetes. Yah! But - my overall cholestrol is "slightly" high - 235 , with my bad chol being high as well at 155 (should be under 130) the Good chol. however is where is should be. So getting active again, and watching better what I am eating should solve the problem. NOT as easy as it sounds however. The antidepressant is still making me very sluggish - I can not seem to find the motivation or will power anywhere. But I will I suppose. Have to....

And today I leave you all with this -

Life Is

Written By: Unknown

Life is a challenge - meet it.

Life is a gift - accept it.

Life is an adventure - dare it.

Life is a sorrow - overcome it.

Life is a tragedy - face it.

Life is a duty - perform it.

Life is a game - play it.

Life is a mystery - unfold it.

Life is a song - sing it.

Life is an opportunity - take it.

Life is a journey - complete it.

Life is a promise - fulfill it.

Life is a beauty - praise it.

Life is a struggle - fight it.

Life is a goal - achieve it.

Life is a puzzle - solve it.

Life is eternal - believe it.

Da' Mom

I am SO Da' Mom right now.
C. is so obsessed with Star Wars right now.
So for is birthday next week, which is conveniently a day off of school, we are headed to the Frankin Institute (even got Dad to agree to go along) to see the Star Wars exhibit. I can not tell you how excited C. is. They even have a cock pit simulator of the Millenium Falcon (not sure what that truly is but hey, I do know it is one of the fighter jets from ONE of the movies! Give a mom a break) - in which he can not wait to take a ride.
I absolutely LOVE being able to do this stuff with and for the kids. So excellent to see him to excited. He practically jumped out of his skin when I asked him if he wanted to go.
And double bonus points, K. loves the city and can't wait to go again.
We are going to one of the later entry times, (half off) so we will go later in the day. spend the afternoon in the Institute, see the exhibit, then go for something to eat, come home later, hopefully forgoing any rush hour traffic. That is the "plan" anyway. Worked well when we went to see King Tut, so prayerfully it will work again.

If you want to see the link to the exhibit it is here.
http://www2.fi.edu/exhibits/traveling/starwars/overview.php
There is a robot exhibit, actual movie artifacts - Darth Vaders REAL helmet from episode 3 - oh hold me back! ::::smile:::: To a kid that is star obsessed at the moment, nothing could be better.
And can I add that my BABY is going to be double 1's next week! Oh my.

Things are cooking around here

Finally a REAL snow day!

C. spent about 3 hours out in it building piles, and "forts".

Then, he came in and got to work on dinner. Yup. Dinner. He and K. have been all about making meals lately. Got cook books from the library and everything. K was making lists of meals to make. Not that she is going eat mind you, meals mom and dad will eat. We will have to work on the "trying new things" portion of the cooking. For now Iwill take what I can get and enjoy my time in the kitchen with them. On the menu tonight, was Emeril's french baguette pizzas. Fresh hand grated cheese. fresh bread. Yum. I will say they turned out terrific!C. was proud of himself. And he did not need much help at all. Even cut the tops of the bread by himself.


And K was in charge of dessert. Texas Sheet Cake. She needed a bit more help as there is more measuring and steps involved, but she did most of it herself. She is in charge of dinner tomorrow night. Already has some spare ribs marinating, has made macaroni salad for daddy (which she proclaimed the entire time, "stinks" - teehee) Tomorrow night she is planning a Jewish apple cake for dessert.

I figure if I line them up a few nights a week, I can really take advantage of this need to cook thing! But as soon as it interferes with what they want to do after school, I am sure the phase will end. For now I will encourage it as much as I can!

Where is God!?

There are some times when you just can't help but ask yourself this.

I have a dear friend going through some pretty crappy stuff right now. Down right unreal honestly. My sister has gone through more in the last two years than any one person should have to go through in a lifetime, let alone such a short span of time, and it is not over yet. People who are supposed to live long happy retirements with their wives, die. Families lose fathers. Children get sick. Men die in war.

No one deserves any of it. My friend and my sister are good people, who haven't "done" anything to deserve anything that has come their way. None of us does.

And there are times where words just do not even come. Nothing I could have said to my friend this evening would have not sounded hallow, contrite and just plain stupid. There are no words to express, or that would have made her "feel better" at the moment. Sometimes saying nothing, says it all.

*warning everything from here and below is my own opinion and the way I see my faith and the world around me. I hope it inspires anyone else who may read it to think a little, but know it is my personal opinion, not studied theology. I just pray it all comes out as I intend it to sound.*

So where is God in all this?

Some folks wonder.

I do not believe God "punishes". I believe He hurts right along with us. I do believe He set into motion the patterns on this earth, biological and geological. We were made human, and live in a human exsistence, in the world He created. That includes pain, hurt, disease, war, and death. All facts of life. I believe God allows us to be human. He also gave us free will to often chose to do things He does not want us to do, or things that hurt ourselves, or those around us. He allows human things to happen to us. Good people sometimes hurt. And it is easy to get all wrapped up in that hurt.

Where is God when we are hurting!?

I think my friend said it well tonight, well sort of, She said, "why do we bother getting up in the morning?"

THAT is where God is. He is there encouraging. Giving the strength to yet again get up and face another day.

It is faith and hope that get you up every morning.

It is faith and hope that give you a reason to go on when you don't think there is another ounce of perserverence in you. God is helping you up under the arms to stand one more time.

Faith, whether it is faith in God that He is there for you and good things will happen, or just faith and hope in knowing that good will come.

I am not saying that good things have to come from bad things. That whole "God's plan" comment gives me mixed emotions. I do not think pain is in God's plan for us. He does not send us painful experiences. I do know He knows painful experiences come with the territory. I do believe He can and does use those experiences to either teach us something, have someone learn from us. Do I think He can take a painful experience, and create some good out of it? sure. Can we? Sure! many people have started foundations, raised awareness, taught others about their illnesses. All of which would never have some about had that person not experienced that pain the first place. Some changes and goals can only be reached on a hard rocky path. Do I think a wife, losing her husband at a young age is God's plan? No. Do I think it is part of our humanity? Yes. Do I think He can place another wonderful person in her life a few years later, sure. God talks to us all the time, and sends us wonderful things. We can chose to live with an open mind and hopeful heart and see those things. Or we can chose to be bitter and angry, close our hearts and never see or feel the help and love, and good things God tries to send us. It is so easy to blame all the bad on Him, yet just take the blessings and happy times for granted, as something we just "deserve". Often times we don't even see how good we "had it" until there is pain in our world, and we can reference the good things against it.

Human situations that earthly speaking are hopeless are the reality of our world. Yet we get up, every day, with hope. For those that have faith in something bigger then themselves, be it God for me or something else for someone else, there is always hope. Hope can not make all the pain go way. I am not sure all the pain every goes away. But it does give us a rope to hold on to, while we heal. God gives us friends to be there with us. He sent Jesus so we know there is more to our exisitence then what we see and do on earth. God touches us every day through friends and other people in our lives. An open heart will feel it. Hope and faith open your heart.

I heard a country song on the way home tonight, and I must find the lyrics....the main title was "learning to walk with rocks in your shoes" - basically is says we have a choice to make, we can let things get us down and keep us down, or we can learn to walk with rocks in our shoes.

May support of our friends, and faith make the rocks in our shoes much lighter.

My sweet Valentine's

These are the first pictures I have taken since the snow in JANUARY! It is winter. We are seriously not DOING anything. I guess when you don't have those cute little toddlers that change on a weekly basis, you don't feel the n eed to be constantly snapping pictures every single day.

But here they are , my silly valentine's with thier new Webkins. Yes, he needs a hair cut.
This girl is just plain silly.
And obviously, all three of them think I need more chocolate. J. got me some wilted roses at WalMart Wed nite....and I am happy he even bothered with that. I perked them up a bit. Thank goodness the kids are old enough now to bug him about shopping. They also got me new ankle bracelets and some toe rings. Happy happy. WalMart - but it's the thought that counts. And considering I just got myself a rather expensive ticket to see Kenny Chesney along with Keith URban, Leanne Rimes, Gary Allen, and Sammy Hagar in July. I am SO psyched. So I will take wilted roses and cheap jewelry from my lovies. And yes, that was J's choice of valentine box - Larry The Cable Guy in a diaper. *sigh* The depth of romance floors me. ::grin::And I have been told he wants the box "for his room" when I am finished with it. At the rate the rest of them are eating MY chocolate, that won't be long!It's a good thing it is valentine's day every day around here, so we don't need a special day to commemorate it. :::grin:::

2 in 1

We got a two in one day deal today! I wanted to get this quote down before I forgot it.

Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj : Once you realize that the road is the goal and that you are always on the road, not to reach a goal, but to enjoy its beauty and its wisdom, life ceases to be a task and becomes natural and simple, in itself an ecstasy.

Which in a wordy exostential philosophical way is saying, "enjoy the journey" - otherwise you may miss scenes like this. I throughly believe that sometimes God wants us to enjoy and appreciate where we are, before He gives us more. Sometimes we deny ourselves our joy, but simply not realizing it is all around us. we ar elooking for the "prize" at the end of the road, when we have been traveling with it all along.

What is that 'scrapping' thing?

This is what I actually do with all those pictures I take. Pictures do not do this layout justice at all. Much more vivid in real life. You may recognize the pictures from last week's post, I added the poem on journalling strips, added a bit of bling and voila - immortallized forever - or at least until someone 50 years from now finds the old album, says why am I saving this and throws it away. I decided to "take the day off" yesterday....no chores. Play. Feels good. Needed it. Scrapping, creating keeps me sane. Helps me focus more on the positive things in life. Happy times. Even scrapping this 'rocky teen years' topic helps me put it all in perspective. We have all been there and survived. Some better than others. But we made it through. At the teen-age, you couldn't convince my sister with hours of debate that her life was actuallly good. If you had asked her, at the time, her life sucked the big one and she couldn't wait to get out. She has grown. Made some mistakes. Had tons of joy and hardship as an adult, but she made it through, and in the end, has a great life. With all our teeth gnashing and worrying, in the end it will have to work itself out - for good or bad. Things I thought were the worst things in my teen life, turned out looking back as an adult where the best changes in my life in the long run. Hard to keep that in mind though when you are going through it with your own kids.

I do want to do a "what I want her to know" layout. Things I really want K to realize.

Your teen years frankly are hell. Maturing. Awkward. Young love. Hurt. They have this "these are the best years of my life" expectations - they shoudl be fun, yes, but "the best" I doubt. I want her to know her 20's and 30's (and I am hoping my 40's ) were far better! I want her to know no one will ever love her the way she needs to love herself. I want her to know she needs to be able to depend on herself first. I want her to know life will hurt, but you heal. I want to tell her to have fun when she can. There is so much as a parent you want to tell your kids. But they don't want to listen. This kind of teaching comes from doing rather than saying, and honestly that is scary. Am I doing a good enough job? I won't know til 20 years from now and I am thinking, man I screwed that one up! I just share with her what I can. We talk about my teen years, how I felt, how I have grown and changed. And hopefully she sees her potential.

well - Back to reality today - off to work I go.

I would much rather be scrappin'

Gotta love him

The other man in my life.

This guy cracks me up every day.

This morning he gets up, comes into my bathroom, and says to me...

Mom - This morning, I felt my brain wake up!

Where does he come up with this stuff!? He says, "I was laying in bed, and I didn't have my eyes open yet, one second I was dreaming and all of a sudden 'zing' I felt my brain wake up, and I sat up and looked at the clock, it was 6:30! But I couldn't keep it awake. "

You just have to smile.

And I seriously need to take some GOOD recent photos. This is another from October of last year.

I have been uploading some photos to a photo site for printing,a nd looking back to 2006 is an eye opener! Man, the difference two years can make! Have to post some compare contrast photos tomorrow. K has changed the MOST. wow.

This and That

Because every blog post needs a picture, and I never got around to posting about J's birthday. As you can see he is sporting a little "scruff" on the chin there. I told him months ago that I liked it, and he still shaved it off. UNTIL - one of my friend's commented how nice he looked with the scruff, and lo and behold, since then, he has been sporting the new look. Even bought a beard trimmer to "maintain" the look. He can't let it get too long, because it does get very grey. It is not as noticeable when it is shorter. Going on 17 years of marriage this year and how can I still adore this guy? Drives me crazy at times, but he has been incredibly patient with me the last few months, and has been so much more involved around here since starting his antidepressant. That is a good thing!
Otherwise, there is literally not a whole lot to post about around here. It is January. We don't do anything in January. Let see if I can come up with ten things to write about.
1. Report cards yesterday. Tough day. want to praise C. cause he does very well. Yet, the balance between his praise and the difficulty of K's not being very good is tough. We know about her's ahead of time because of parent portal but it is still a big sigh moment to see it all printed out. She did bring up a few of her grades to pass, so that is good.
2. K. qualified for the Pepsi regional bowling tournament. So the end of the month we are off to Carlisle Pa to compete. She is excited about that.
3. So ready for spring. Tired of being cooped up.
4. Dear friend of mine, once again facing hospice for a loved one. Difficult time, yet relief at the same time. Hard one. Saying extra prayers for her. The kids were so sweet, they over heard me talking to her last night and both asked about it before bed and said extra prayers for a man they don't even know. Man, I adore those two kids.
5. Let's see half way....
6. Teaching again at the scrapbook store this weekend. Third weekend in a row. It is so much fun and not a "job" at all. Classes are finally picking up which is great for my scrappy pocketbook!
7. For being January the weather is crap here. rain. mud. yuck. yet still cold.
8. Trying to cut back on my mocha lattes. Tough.
9. Been totally swamped at work. J is a happy camper, but I am tired of getting home later, jumping right into dinner and homework, and before i know it bed time! Man am I spoiled?
10. I think we decided where to go on vacation! FLORIDA. In August. Yes, we are nuts, but off peak, no lines, better deals. C. saw the Universal Studios brochure and now there is no changing our minds! No beach this year. That will be weird. But it is time for us to do something different with the kids. Grand Canyon, Tennessee, and Bahamas were also on our list. Maybe Vegas next year. Also want to see San Diego but the air fare was crazy.
There! Ten things! I now return us to our regularly scheduled day.