Thanks Neena and Pappa!

Not the best picture in the world....but it was dusk....and forgive that K is in her slippers.

Neena and Pappa sent us a Ladder Ball Set and the kids have not stopped playing it! As well as Mommy and Daddy!

We saw this last summer at the beach, and mentioned we should get one. Thought disappeared as fast as it came. And the interesting thing was on Sunday while we were reading the sunday paper, J and I had seen the ladderball set over and over in each sale flyer. We kept seriously saying that we really should get one, the kids would love it. Low and behold, Wednesday I get home from work and the kids are in the yard playing it. Just as I was about to ask J where he got it, the kids come running and yelling, Look what Neena and Pappa sent! Ironic. There is no way even if J mentioned to her on the phone sunday , that it could possibly get here by Wed. So great minds think alike!

So thank again Neena and Pappa! we are having a blast with it!

Just stuff

Just a bunch of randomness today. The sun us shining. I am sipping my coffee. Nice cool breeze blowing in the window. Nothing too deep in my head today. Feels nice. This would be an attempt to make homemade playdough. She stuck her hands in way too soon. The flour and I came to the rescue!

I just have to take a second for my own memory - and say just how proud I am of this girl. So many people have commented in the last two weeks about mow much mature and comfortable with herself she seems to be. We had the meeting about her last retest - good and bad - still some work to be done, but thankfully everything that was still *red* on the test, coincides with things we are still seeing, mostly with continues mild anxiety and difficulty with school. her self confidence is improving and she is really start to emit a *vibe* other than "make me disappear" She is just starting to carry herself so differently. She is so much calmer. Taking some getting used to on our parts. That said.....

Can I also gush about this guy for a minute? God bless him. He works so hard for us, at work and home. He has spent every spare minute in the last month, so that the pool deck would be ready for this year. Lord knows we have had our moments, but he can still make my heart skip a beat, and make me look forward to his coming home. Also don't mind watching him work.
This is our new pool buddy this year. C picked him out. They are in the process of naming it. teehee.....Zoey I can not say , was too fond of it. She stayed "poofy" for quite some time and walked around eyeing the penguin for a good thirty minutes.

This kid has also been tireless in helping his daddy. Holding boards, drilling, being *gofer* - so fitting that he and his friend were the first in the pool.

70 degrees in the water. Yet, they were in the pool!

This would be 100% the reason J , the big kid in my house, and the littler kids wanted the deck. Not to sit. Not to make getting in and out easier. But - jumping. #1 on the list. So I think there will be lots of this happening. Maybe my sitting with a book on the deck won't be such a good idea!

So what do two boys do when the water gets a bit too chilly?

Fish in the pool of course! They were pretending to catch each other. Just a small weight on the end of the line.

Memorial day

This put a huge lump in my throat.

Received it in an email, so I can not give credit for the source, or actual date.

The caption reads....

Pearl Harbor survivor Houston James of Dallas embraced Marine Staff Sgt. Mark Graunke Jr. during a Veteran's Day commemoration in Dallas yesterday. Graunke lost a hand, a leg and an eye when he diffused a bomb in Iraq last year. This week's images of U.S. Troops in combat in Fallujah deepened the day's significance for many who attended tributes held in San Diego and across the nation. Assoc. Press.

So, as excited as I am for a sunny warm weekend, this immediately reminded me of the real reason for the *holiday*. I try to remind the kids every year, and really one year will go to Arlington and Washington on this weekend. So many brave brave men, fought hard and lost thier lives for our right to do things like blog, say what we want, live in a free democratic society , without fear of living under the control of tyrants like Sudam Hussien. I have had the pleasure in my job or meeting many many men who fought WW2, and Vietnam. Their stories amaze me. Very many tell me stories of their buddies falling right next to them. Infections. Illness. Freezing cold. Hunger. When you went then, you went for years - 3, 4, 5 years away from home and loved ones. Yet, they are all more than proud to say they were there, and they have all told me they would do it again. They believed in what they were doing, and believe in our troops in Iraq doing good now. To these men, I give my deepest respect every day.

Teheee

Ever wake up feeling like you slept like this?

I did today.

I one more busy day and night and things will be more relaxed for the weekend. Thank goodness.

K starts her revised biofeedback training tonight. This should hopefully be our last go round. Pray for that please.

And - if anyone knows how to teach a dog to wipe thier own feet, can you please let me know. This mud is getting to me. Forgetting it has been raining for three days and Zoey will NOT stay out from below the deck, darn rabbits, I left the back door open for her to let herself back in after she went out ....until it dawned on me that for some reason there were fresh muddy dog prints all over the rug, crap! Darn it. I can only blame myself. So I am thinking i can teach her to fetch the paper, maybe I can teach her to wipe her feet! Thankfully the carpet outside the back door and inside the back door, and kitchen floor took off the majority of the wet muddy crude...just some light prints on the carpet. *sigh* SO guess what I will be doing when I get home today - no wait - taking K to therapy - guess what I will be doing at 9 pm tonight?

*sigh*

Anyone want a really cute dog?

Wow.

If you struggle with your faith or you don't, this post from Jaymun's father on their blog yesterday is incredible. He has such a way with words I will never have, and has a way of explaining faithfulness in so many different ways. I urge you to go read it. Remember, this is a man who is presently walking through a dark time, and remains so faithful. But I also like that he is so honest about passing doubt as well.
http://www.jaymun.com/journal/2008_05_18/

The good news is that the intrathecal chemo is working well, and Jaymun's counts are way down.
Now they just have to stay that way.

Other good news in my small small little world is that the sun us shining today! Yeah! You will think I am totally odd when I tell you , that I could almost see all the flowers in the garden stretching toward the warmth when I walked out with C. to the yard to catch the bus. I planted some new things this year,and am anxious to see them bloom and see how they look where I put them. I would take a picture but I left my camera at the scrap store yesterday.

Come on summer!

Memorial Day - 6 days and counting.

And - know what?

It is freakin' cold !

Barely 60 today. Rainy.

Bleach.

The flowers are loving it though - and the weeds too - but I won't think about them until I have some Round Up in hand!

Soooooo ready for summer.

Feet up.

Glass of wine in hand.

Pond bubbling away.

Preferably J. sitting next to me.

Sun on my face.

*sigh*

Weekend update

For not having anything on the calander this weekend, it wound up pretty full

This is how the boys spent the weekend. C. caught the first fish on Saturday. He was very excited about that. I had to be a bit curious when I saw the living fish in a bread bag next to the pond later in the day. They were trying to save him (see no one here eats fish, let along fresh fish that was just swimming a few minutes ago) Seems the poor thing made it through the entire day hanging off a chain, but did not survive hook removal and wound up in the freezer anyway. Sunday was a rain out and no fish caught. C. loves these rodeos.

K and I got some girlie time, and she had some girl friend time Friday and Sat night. She has seen more rented movies in the last month than I have seen in the last year. I can remember those lazy nights. We also did manage to get her two bathing suits, one bikini and one tankini - which she didn't resist as much as I thought. She needed something respectful for when she was in public or at someone else's house. Honestly, in and out of the dressing room in no time flat. What I wouldnt' give to be that size again.

Last night, this would be attempts to make home made play do for FCS class without fully reading the directions! Pretty messy and funny. But we did manage to salvage it! But what was sitting on the counter this morning when I came down? Yup. Thankfully her teacher will give her credit if she brings it in next class. We made salt dough and a peanut butter dough. Rather gross. I prefer the salt recipe, even though it requires cooking it.

OK

Found this photo on the camera when I was deleting to make some more room on the card....spider web over the pond last fall.....

So - After you spend time reading my incredibly interesting zoo post below *snicker* *yawn* - I want comments. Yes - I said comments...after I posted about the zoo, I opened my email box and realized how much bigger this blog has gotten than I ever realized. Started out as a way to keep in touch with distant relatives and friends..and I never expected this friend to tell that friend, to tell that friend....and people are emailing me that I never knew were reading. (makes me think I need to be more selective about what I write, but then again - I am what I am, and you can close the screen if you don't want to read it ) And since I am feeling a bit wishywashy today (Just read Jaymun's update for today *sigh* ) - I decided I need to hear some postive things - so....

I want to know what makes you feel blessed. And no - you can not simply say, "my husband and kids" - dig a bit deeper. I want you to find the small things...the important things...look deeper. Why do you feel blessed by your husband? Or your children? What is about say your garden that makes you feel blessed or happy?? I will share my reasons tomorrow...although J and the kids are not the only reason I feel blessed today......

Zoo

Finally! Blogger worked!

We have zoo pictures!

Cheers me up since I am in a funk this morning because the *good* coffee is gone, I had to resort to the *it'll do* coffee. Doesn't even smell right brewing!

But anyway.....I digress.....

This is what happens when you give a 13 year old the camera.

*chuckle*

K is obsessed with elephants right now. Has been for about a year now. She must have taken 20 pictures of three elephants. Anyway - I love the zoo. After a brief * I can't stand that they are all caged* hiatus after college. I got over it. I did have to have that talk with K sunday though, as she expressed dismay about the cages. I reminded her that zoo's were meant for conservation, and education, and without those things a lot of these animals would be extinct etc. So she felt a bit better about it.

So for Mother's Day I requested a trip to the zoo. The last time we were there was right after my mom died ten years ago. C was 18 months old! Certianly a different experience this time around. I was never so grateful to be at this point in our life as I watched strollers, and mom's trying to breast feed sitting on a bench outside the monkey house, and heard screaming and crying, and some very loud parent's who really needed to remember they were in public.

I was also very grateful that there is a Starbucks (mini one) in the zoo!

So much about the zoo has changed, and yet so much hasn't. It is almost surreal to enter and see the same impala fountain and elephant statue. It just takes me back years, and warms my soul.

The new moneky enclosure is way cooler than the old one, as well as the new cat exhibit. Much nicer than cages.

This guy was sleeping up there like that. Totally relaxed arms and legs hanging over. I so wish I could get that comfy in my own bed. Monkeys are always fun to watch. The reaction of the crowd when the gorillas move around always fascinates me. We watched a pair of spider monkeys display *the facts of life* which thankfully did not last long, and my 13 year immediately deemed *disgusting* and ran the other way. It was funny though to watch the male, keep chasing the female when they got , um interupted....you could just hear the converstation going on between the two of them, as he poked at her, and she evaded him....J and I kept the dialogue to ourselves, and it was quite entertaining. Love monkeys. I could not get a good shot of what I deemed the *Beatles* monkeys. They were orange, small, but had long straight hair that hung down on the sides like the Beatles hair dos of so long ago! Of course, the under 15 set had no idea what I was refering to.

One of my favorite pictures from the day. The cats have always been my favorite. Spent lots of time in the old cat house sitting watching the tigers pace. No more indoor cages. No pictures of the tigers though. They were all sleeping in corners. K also likes the cheetahs and pumas etc. C interestingly enough, didn't really have a favorite. He did get to see the crocs eat rats, that was *cool mom* - we plan to go again soon and get there earlier to see more feeding times. (since we are now members, and joining was only like $20 more than what it would have cost us to get in once!)

This was J's favorite. I think it is called a Scottish Highland Cattle, and is very rare....he took tons of pictures of them. Cute in their own way. Reminds me of the sheep dog that out foxes the wolf on the bugs bunny cartoons.

Hey buddy got any more?

We got into the lorakeet house just under the closing wire. These guys are gorgeous. We got to hand feed them in Myrtle Beach a few years ago. There is nectar in those littles cups and pretty much as soon as they see you enter with it, they are on it. They sit on your arm and drink the nectar. They are bright and beautiful. This is one sitting on J's arm while he tried to lean back and get a picture. For some reason, he also had three more on his other arm,a nd shoulder. Each of us only had one.

There are more that I will share in tomorrow's post. Too may to fit in one post. Nothing else going on around here, so might as well milk this! No major ponderings either.

Just counting they days, and I mean me, not the kids - til the end of school. Although this summer may be interesting to say the least.

D@mn Cancer

I promise I will do a mother's day post soon....just no time the last two days....we were away all day Sunday. Work is swamped so I have a more than average full schedule.....appts tonight and K's chorus concert tomorrow night....more cr@p with K and school/homework...the frustration is incredible.....to be honest there are some days I wish it was possible not to care.
In the meantime - I am not sure what made me click on this blog this morning. I followed Jaymun's progress with his leukemia last year, and he went into remission I believe it was around Christmas. I used to check back often,but they never really updated. For some reason today, I decided to check again. His leukemia is back. This time in his spinal fluid. This was one of my mom's metastisis also. My heart just fell when I read the post. Figured he could use a few extra prayers.
http://www.jaymun.com/journal/2008_05_11/

ugh

Pray for me

This weekend is the neighborhood yard sale.

If you recall where my mother's day gift was purchased last year.

I have managed to thwart any familial attempts to want to put our "unwanteds" out for sale.

I just do not care for sitting in a lawn chair next to my folding tables, watching people try not to catch my eye, while they are assessing whether or not 50 cents is too much to pay for some piece of junk I don't want any longer.

But with $$ in their eyes, the kids have decided *this* is the year that we have our own yard sale.

So who I am to squelch an entrepreneurial spirit.

So guess what we will be doing til late into the night Friday night? Pricing. Ugh. Trying to convince an 11 year old that someone may not want to pay $5 for that Yugioh card.

Altho Mommy is a purger. There isn't much to sell. Except K's room...there may be enough in there to pay her college tuition.

I did manage to pick out somethings that have never managed to make it to the walls or shelves here in the new house. I figure if we haven't needed it in 7 years, it can get sold.

So - I told Jim *he* can get up early to go to the diner with them for breakfast most saturday mornings, he can be the one that gets up at 7 am to begin *the watch* -

pray the weather holds, and I am hoping to just make enough cash to lessen the financial burden of a trip to the zoo for Mother's day Sunday!

Reading

Gotta love it.

No tv.

A trip to the library.

Absolute quiet when we got home.

Neither of these two really really enjoy reading like I do.

But I am grateful that they are liking it more and more. As long as they are reading what they want to. You'll notice K's choice of brain candy today is Garfield.

And thank goodness for graphic novels. They have taken classics like Nancy Drew and Hardy Boys and made them into HUGE comic books.....or at least the kids think they are comic books. Really they are quite wordy, but who am I to point that out? C. is now immersed in the Star Wars series he found in graphic novel.

I don't care what they read, as long as they read.

I can get lost in a good book and have been known to stay up til 3 am finishing a good one. My love of reading and ability to transport myself somewhere else for awhile had a lot to do with surviving my adolescence. I pray the kids learn to love to read even more.

K is presently totally dismayed by being informed that she *must* chose a book from *the list* and read it over the summer and write a summary ON THE FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL moooommmmmm!

The travisty!

Teehee....and imagine now as an adult I am starting to WANT to read from that list again.....Great Expectations is on my list.

PS thank you all for your wonderful kind and encouraging comments on my last post. Like I said I do not allow my self the self pity very often. My life is what it is, but sometimes you get caught up and can't help it. I am raising wonderful kind sweet generous and caring kids. That matters for a lot. (there was an "I love you mom" note hanging on the frig Tuesday am for me to find after K went to school. I left her one to find on her bed last night. She hung it on the frig when she found it ) And this too shall pass, whether we like it or not, and I know in a few years we will look back and wonder what the heck all the fuss was about.

My home

This is what the front of the house looks like right now. Much more vivid in real life.

I remember driving into the driveway yesterday afternoon and just thinking about how happy this makes me. Little did I know major frustration awaited me inside. Thank goodness for that moment. It makes me sad that is will only look like this maybe another week. And there will be that blah period between spring flowers and when the perennials come in. I have added a ton of colro in pots on the deck and porch so that will help in the interum.

I was not going to come here and dump my frustration from last night, but it keeps nagging at me...so I will. I promised myself I would be honest here so when I go back and read it a year from now I will remember how ridiculous I was at times!

It is mid-term. need I say more? after being so elated last quarter of how well K was doing...and she did have her best quarter yet this year last quarter (even though we saw a distinct downward spiral the second half of the quarter) well it seems that spiral has continued. Social studies and english have become the bain of our existence. She risks failing both, and if she does not do well in SS , she will be in summer school. My good hearted, sweet kid will be in summer school. I couldn't help it. I lost it. We have worked so hard to give her every ounce of help we can possibly give. She has come INCREDIBLY far with her biofeedback and therapy, her anxiety is worlds better, she is so much calmer and in our eyes doing so much better than ever before, YET we continue to not see her be able to succeed in certain areas of school. We are not looking for A's, and perfect scores. Simply a consistent average performance. The fact that that keeps escaping us, is killing me. I am a problem solver. I need to know why. I want so much for her. There is so much I know will be out of her reach if her grades are not better. Many school priviledges are based on your grades. She is not a discpline challenge. I am told she is a pleasure to have in class. Yet, there are things she won't be permitted to do simply because of her grades. But I digress.

So as I sat and took a moment of self pity last night, I tried as hard as I could to give it up to God. I have major difficulty with that. Other areas not so much, but giving this up to God and letting Him to take care of it, is tough. Slowly over the evening as I prayed to myself about it, and thought about it, I slowly let is creep in that we are doing everything we can. There are just some things that are going to be up to her, that extra effort that may be required. I don't know if that is it or not. But I have to maintain my confidence in all the decisions we have made up to this point. Otherwise I will drive myself crazy, and believe me that is a short trip.

Then I was reading the paper and there was a letter to a psychologist - and basically his point was in this day and age (and I hope I get this out right ) are parent's just not satisfied with "good enough" anymore? Is it so drilled into our heads how magnificant our children have to be, that raising a polite curteous, socially conscious child isn't good enough if they are not a straight A student? His point was there are plenty of "good enough" kids that go on to do great things and be good people.
Prayer does work. It is what I needed to hear. No- it does not mean I will give up on K. and throw everything to the wind and let it be. I will continue to stick to the strategies that we have instituted, and the decisions we have made, but have to give myself permission and the peace of heart to know that maybe for now that has to be good enough. I have to believe it will all work out. My daughter is a caring beautiful well behaved respectable child. That has to matter for something.

God knows I would be eternally grateful if this is the most challenging thing we ever have to deal with in our children's lives. Doesn't make dealing with it on the day to day any easier, but I have to keep perspective.

I have not yet returned to that happy heart that I had driving into the driveway admiring my flowers yesterday, but I am getting there.

Happy Monday!

Right now, this lovely scent is wafting in the front door and just making me want to go outside and lay in a sunbeam all day.

This would be why I can not stand the artificial smell of flowery candles...much prefer the real thing.

The extra treat was , that when I went out to snap a shot of the lilacs and come back here to immortalize it here forever, Mr Bee here happened to be tasting the blossoms. I honestly can not look at a bee the same way since seeing Bee Movie.

And just had to put this here...I went looking for inspiration and motivating quotes to put here with my beautiful picture to inspire me...and this is what I came across..had to chuckle...

If you pass by the color purple in a field and don't notice it, God gets real pissed off.-

Alice Walker

Teehee....but it made me think...purple is one of those colors that when you see it in a field, it is so dramatic against green grass, or yellow butter cups...so perhaps God did put it there to make us notice? There is one purpose of flowers i believe is to make us slow down and take notice of God's creation. J and I went yesterday to the nursery and I intended just to grab a few things I knew I wanted , and we wound up wandering and talking about how nice *this or that* would look *there*, or how pretty that would be there...and even he got wrapped up in it all...altho I think he was more on the look out for anything that might be able to make a hedge between us and the neighbors, but I digress.........I could just get lost in a nursery for hours. I managed to bring home just a few things for the pots around the house. Trying to rein myself in and not buy tons of new pots for around the canopy on the deck!

And just to redeem myself - a real quote to end my post...Love Walt Whitman and since it is about the lilacs, I chose it. By the way did you know lilacs are one of the oldest hedge flowers and they have been used to trace the migration of settlers across the country becuase they live solong?

In the dooryard fronting an old farm-house near the white-wash'd palings,

Stands the lilac-bush tall-growing with heart-shaped leaves of rich green,

with many a pointed blossom rising delicate,

with the perfume strong I love,With every leaf a miracle -

and from this bush in the dooryard,

With delicate-color'd blossoms and heart-shaped leaves of rich green,

A sprig with its flower I break.-

Walt Whitman, Leaves of Grass, 1865

God's presence

**Warning - more armchair theology here, take it for what it is worth but I hope it touches the way I want it to **
Right now - K is questioning a lot. Why mom, would God allow these things to happen? Woah, major parenting skills there!
Through her therapy, we are discovering she was much more affected by my mom's death than we thought. She was 5, started school the week after her death, and never at the time showed any signs of problems...no sleep problems, no problems in school, no behavior problems....so I was foolish enough to think she came through unscathed. I am not the type to dwell, wring my hands and cry - so it is not like she has been constantly reminded of negative memories over the years. I concentrate on the positive and being proactive, raising funds for cancer patients and research in my mom's name, that sort of thing. I am glad she is finally getting the chance to wrestle a bit out loud with some of the things she has been wrestling with inside. She is still far more obsessed with negative outcomes than I care her to be , but he is her father's daughter as well....so I have to deal with that. So it has led us to a lot of interesting conversations, that I just continually pray that God gives me the right words to give her. Some of my Christian friends can't believe that I am not more upset by her questions and anger at God. I can't force her to have my faith, it has to come on her own, and frankly if she is angry, it means she believes, so that is enough for me right now. I have been trying to share with her how I see some things, without talking about it constantly mind you. But the other day in the car, we talked about God letting bad things happen (is that not the quintessential doubting question for anyone?) - I reminded her that we are on earth, because of Adam and Eve - which she believes and I had to laugh at her observation that they should have just let that apple alone, but I digress - she reminded me that God could change this if He wanted...and we talked about Him not letting us here alone, He was so saddened by what He had to do that He sent His son to give us a path to love and heaven......I shared with her that I don't believe God sits in heaven pointing His finger making bad things happen...I believe He has to sit back and let out humanity happen to us at times. He set the patterns here on earth into place, and let's life happen. He never promised life would be easy but He did promise that He would be there with peace and love when we needed the support. I shared with her that I know God talks to me and guides me if I am willing to listen. My faith has certianly gotten me through many many dark areas. She asked me how I know when God is talking to me. So I explained to her I totally believe when I was searching for other ways to help her ADD/Anxiety the quiet voice in my head that wouldn't let me stop researching until I found the biofeedback was God's way of telling me what I needed to do. Over the last few weeks, the thought that I needed to share with her the fact that my mom was never angry at God for her cancer, and did not want all of us to get angry, or lose one day of our own happiness mourning for her. She accepted it, of course after a period of adjusting, I am not saying she danced in the streets, but she did not blame God. K seemed to be surprised by that, and I am glad I shared.....I have been trying to share with her the good that can come of the bad, and how sometimes we may never see it, but it is there. I think she is listening, becuase yesterday she told me about a song she was listening to on the radio that said somethingto the tune of we are not able to appreciate the good, if we didn't have the bad.
Anyway....this was the trigger for all these thoughts today.....I need to share this story with her...I am sure there are 100's of views opposite mine to this story , but to me it speaks volumes of God's care and love for us. He is not ignoring us here on earth....this is a follow up story about a family that lost their three young children nearly a year ago in a freak traffic accident. They have not let anger stop them from living, and knowing they want children in their lives, got pregnant again,a nd were blessed with triplets born just day s before the anniversary of their children's deaths. Like I said, millions of opinions on this I am sure - but they chose to keep living. They still mourn for their children, and miss them I am sure, and I am positive they are not *replacing* their children, but knew that they wanted children in their lives, and wouldn't let this horrible event change that. I believe God was listening. he blessed them with 3 more children, at a time when they most likely need the encouragement and love in their world. http://www.ocregister.com/articles/coble-children-born-2031842-lori-ladera
Sometimes I think we choose, conciously or unconciously, to ignore and close our hearts to God's love , guidance and the positive outcomes after painful events in our lives. I don't know what I would do in a major life crisis, prayerfully I won't have to ever know, but I like to think I could continue to be faithful, and praise my God.

Take time to pray for or send this family some positive thoughts today, and also take a moment to be thankful that we are here today and able to do just that.

It is done

Done done done!

Yeah!

I can not believe how different it makes everything look.And we put this together in the living room on a rainy monday!

J. could not wait to cook on it. Requested burgers.

So even though it was freezing yesterday. We cooked out and ATE outside.

We never eat outside. The sun is just usually to intense on the back of the house. But the canopy takes care of that! But we did eat fast because of course said sun went away when we were sitting down, and it got rather chilly!

So as you tell by the number of photos (and these are only a few) we are excited abotu all the new. Now mind you - our old grill has been on it's last leg for two years now ( we cook out almost all year round) It has been rusted out, put back together by J., had no ignitor switch (I can now once again start the grill myself without fear of losing an eyebrow or two!), and had sounded like is was exploding every time you turned it off. So new is exciting! Thus we take photos of the food!

C took this one! Good no?

Makes you think that J is the one that cooks on the grill. Right? No.

C'est moi. He may check the meat now and again, but I grill.

Someday it will be hooked up straight to the natural gas from the house. That will be nice.

K and I got some alone time yesterday. She had to go for a retest for her biofeedback. It helps us determine which placements are fully trained and which ones still need work. Last test, did away with about half of her placements, so we are hoping for the same results this time. She is really making progress. School is slowly coming along. Also slowing getting past her anxieties, and some bad habits formed with school. I was amazed at how well she sat still for the test this time around. Such a difference from the fidgiting from before. The truth being though that K. hates the tests. They don't hurt, but the woman who does it is curt, and not at all gentle with the leads, and it requires sitting still and focusing on what she is doing for over an hour. But she understands that they are necessary for finishing biofeedback, and goes along. Then I treat her to staying out of school for the rest of the day. We go to lunch and yesterday we hit WalMart (woohoo how exciting- picked up some highlights for her, new shorts and a new book), etc. So as we are leaving WalMart, K - the *difficult* teen that she is sometimes , and really not as often as it seems when all I do is complain about those moments, and all the challenges and stress school provides all of us - she looks at me and says, "yeah mom, I hate those tests , but you know the best part? Getting to hang out with you"

*sigh* S'all good.

So then yesterday we colored her hair . After I talked her out of day-glo red, into a nice cinnamon red highlight. Turned out well actually. But man, that kid has A LOT of hair! So right now I am at the top of the mom rocks list. I am certain I will fall from grace shortly enough, but will enjoy it for now!