*yawn*

Is it Monday already? Where did the weekend go?

Late night last night. I had slept in the afternoon because I had a headache,a nd of course couldn't sleep then last night. Got wrapped up in a book, The Memory Keepers Daughter. Not sure why it got my attention so fast, it is not particularly fast moving or exciting but something about the characters just got my attention. K. was then up late screaming and crying because once again, mommy over ruled by daddy, she spent time on the computer watching and looking at way too many CSI clips and shows. So I made him calm her down, but of course I was also awake. She loves a good mystery but can not handle the gore of CSI - no matter how many times I remind her when she wants to watch them. Here are their finished tie dye projects. Both were too impatient to give me time to wash the new shirts, so the color did not spread like I would have liked, but they turned out neat nonetheless. I think we may tie dye our Relay shirts.
Summer boredom is already setting in. This is what the poor dog has to endure when the kids get bored. They sorted through their book bags Sat, and found K's chorus medal, and a party hat that C. found in his desk at school. This dear sweet thing is so tolerant of their antics.
And speaking of this dear sweet thing - one day I am going to look back on my blog and wonder why the heck did I take a picture of the dogs rear end? Exactly so I can remember this - she may have broken her tail. We were busy Sat, and didn't take notice of anything unusual in the morning. But I went to see a patient in the afternoon, the kids were solo for a short while, but my niece was here, and they really just played. They don't let the dog out when I am not here. But when I came home, I noticed she didnt' seem to be moving her tail much and it was hanging down rather limp. She didnt' yelp when we touched and poked, but did not care for it, and licked when we stopped. No one of course had any idea what happened, and we can't figure it out. She kept it limp all day, and evening, but would tuck it under her and sit with no problem. Sunday am, I watched her closely to be sure she could go to the bathroom, and *breath a sigh of relief* she could lift it for that and did not cry. She started to lift it more last night but not for long. And NO wagging. What is bothering me the most is not knowing what happened. Did someone walking by hurt her? The kids pull on it ?(altho everyone denies and when it comes to Zoey's well being I think they would fess up) I have always realized Zoey's tail is a huge part of her. The weapon we call it. Everyone knows to stay out of the way of the tail. But I did not realize how much it was part of her personality until she stopped wagging it. She gets so excited for so many things so easily and her tail wagging was a huge part of that. This dog can hit herself in the face with her tail if she is excited enough. At times, Zoey IS her tail.To see it so limp, just made her look that much more sad. All the times that I wished she would stop hitting me with it, or settled down, right now I would give nothing more than to see her whipping that baby around a bit. She is just not Zoey with out that tail wagging in full swing an enthusiasm. *side note* Since I started this post - see how long it takes me to get these things done?- I put her out, and am relieved to see today she is at least holding her tail out straight and the curl on the end is back. She held it up to sniff the air a bit. Still no wagging but the curl being back is a good thing. May at least save us a trip to the vet today.

Never a dull moment around here. I do not have to make my life up that is for sure! But hey - if the worse thing I have to worry about is the dog's tail, I am in good shape!

Apparently...

Apparently, I needed one of these and didn't even know it! A few months ago - I got the inclination to get my expresso machine out and start making more of my mochas at home again. I had given up about a year ago, it just wasn't making a good cup, and resorted to just regular ol' jo every morning, which I am getting quite fond of. When I started to use it again, it was evident that it was not working any better than I remembered, and I went and accidently broke the little pot that goes with it. Oh well, I thought, I'll just stick to coffee. Well - I had noticed J's eBay habit increasing and increasing, and had walked in on him again and again, looking at expresso machines. "I don't need one" I explicitly remember saying, "We can't afford it", I say another day. Falling on deaf ears I can tell.

So - a huge box arrives right before we leave for Wellsboro. I knew what was in it, but ignored it. When we got back, by Monday night this was on my counter. "look at your birthday present", I hear - ::::evil eye from me::::: 'Gee, thanks'. "Ok, then - my father's day present" - now that is more like it, since I am sure this is more for him, than me since I told him not to get it.

God bless the man. I had to step back and realize, in his way, this is his way of telling me he loves me...to go totally against what I told him and get me something he knows I secretly would love but won't get myself. I had to make myself stop and appreciate the gesture and love him for it. So I let him excitedly show me all the features, a water tank...grinds it's own beans...makes hot water, coffee and expresso...one cup or two at a time..adjust the strength of the coffee.....instantly.....J is if nothing else the consumate gadget man. The more things something does, the cooler it is. And getting it at less than retail off of eBay for him is the ulimate pleasure! Make mochas for everyone you know - he says.

I am very chosey about my coffee, and finally got the beans I like this week - and I will have to admit the thing makes a darn good cup of coffee, and more foam in a cup of milk that ever. I can make one cup at a time, which is nice since I am the only one that drinks it in the morning, use my own beans, not premade pods.

Everytime I sit down to my cup o' jo, especially like last night when I made him a coffee and myself a mocha latte, and we enjoyed them outside on the swing *sigh*, I can smile and know my husband loves me and does want to please me. I just have to remember to look for it sometimes. (Secretly I think he is hoping this keeps me away from Starbucks on a daily basis!)

Anyone want to come over for coffee?

Summer fun is here.

So - after we worked on spanish and the 6th grade bridge workbook (yes I am that mean mommy)..... Another thing that seems to have become a tradition, is tie dying on my first day off in the summer. So - today was my first day off. Weather was not great, so a perfect day for a project.
It started to rain on us!
Ooppsss...was I supposed to wear gloves?
And this would be what an 11 year old boy does when he gets ahold of gloves. Trying to blow it up while his hand is in it. Never ceases to amaze me what he thinks to do, not just blow it up, as any typical child would think of, but hey, can I blow it up while my hand is in it?
The best part - the moans and groans that came when I said I have to work tomorrow.

And from my 13 year old - "Today was fun".

Off again Friday - still going to be cool - so after we clean (yup, I am that mom too) I think we may go for a nice walk at Green Lane with the dog. (Who by the way was in major time out today and got TWO baths because she rolled in something dead in the field. I think God above was even wrinkling His nose saying, geesh dawg, what did you do? I know we all groaned, gagged and got her out of the house fast!) No photos of that since I couldn't bath her and take pictures at the same time!

Wheew

The last week has been full full full...... Last day of school last week. We had the perfect weather for our last day ice cream and swimming tradition. Living across the street from the dairy has it's perks!
Then, we were off for what seems to be a yearly tradition - Wellsboro, aka Pa Grand Canyon camping weekend. And yes, that is an actual picture of me. Notice the statigic placement of the kid in front! We had a great time, as usual. The Rattlesnake festival provided some entertainment, and a flea market to make my guys feel right at home.
This is one of the streams that makes up the "Twin Streams" part of the campground we stay. We slopped around and hiked along for awhile on Friday.
Also tried the Turkey Trail once again. J. nearly broke his ankle last week, just a severe sprain, so he was not up to hiking with us - the three of us went about halfway down, and missed him. So we decided to head back up and keep him company. We did find an orange salamander , twice, and a real hard shell millipede. Pretty cool.
So starts the summer! Trying to keep the kids from turning into boob tube idiots is going to prove tricky, since I am working three days....but we'll work it out. They are not too thrilled with the "no tv once mom is home" rule, but will adjust. K. starts tennis Wed night, and the weather will be cool enough this week for us to get out a hit a bit, assuming my shoulder/back feels better.

Patience

Right now - I have none.

I woke up Sunday am - with a severe pain in my shoulder and upper back.
I can not sit here very long
Blogger is not cooperating.
Ergo - foul mood.

Want to share pictures of the last day of school.
Our weekend in Wellsboro.
Thoughts in general.

Now after fighting with this darn thing trying to upload pictures
I give up.

::pout:::

Why I Relay?

I Relay for her.

Yes, and I mean all three of them.

To honor one, and give a sense of purpose and pride to the other two.

Relay, you say? What is that.

The Relay for Life - 24 hour walking event, run by the American Cancer Society, yearly to raise money for local chapters as well as research.

My sister and I started a team the year after my mom died. It was a cause dear to her heart. She had walked in one Relay as a survivor, and sadly the next year did not get to do it again. As sick as she was that year, she still planned on it, even if one of us had to push her in a wheelchair. From the time she was diagnosed her focus was on educating every other woman who would listen to her speak about the importance of mammogram and self exam, even passing out brochures at staff meetings. Since education is a huge part of what the ACS does, it seems fitting that she felt so strongly about supporting them. So honor her memory and continue to carry her torch, we Relay , every year...24 hours (we even walked the entire 24 hours that first year, the two of us. We could barely move when we got home sunday night) - heat and rain. Tent. No sleep. Wet sneakers and all. We also plan tirelessly year after year for our big fundraiser, The Crop for a Cure in Pa, (http://www.cropforacurepa.zoomshare.com/ if you would like to join us this year in October!) in our 9th year now. Both truly are a labor of love, and bring us great joy. This year, they started a Relay in Boyertown. I can not tell you how delighted this would have made my mom. She was very proud of our little hometown, and would have joined every committee there was to support it. Thankfully, my sister did that this year. I will probably volunteer more next year. Here is the link to the Relay site....http://www.events.cancer.org/rflpaboyertown
If you want to walk with us... Click on Join a Team and we are team Pam's Lil Angels.

We are not in control of many things in our own lives. This is just one way we fight back and take back some small token of control in the situation. Instead of sitting around, ringing our hands, doom and gloom - we walk, we raise money, we educate - so perhaps in some small way, we make a difference.
This little boy also motivates me. Another reason to Relay. There are so many that have lost someone they love - as much as losing my mom hurt like hell, I can not imagine losing my child. There is now a less than 20% chance that treatment will work for this little boy, who has fought cancer,literally since the day he was born.
http://www.jaymun.com/videos/08-06-07%20-%20playing%20with%20balloons1.shtml
So this is why I Relay.

Young love

Wow.

I was rooting through some older pictures, looking for one to use for a recent scrap challenge. Came across this one. Haven't seen it in awhile.

Considering that there has been a lot of talk lately, with proms and graduations going on, about high school etc.Triggers a lot of thoughts.

I remember this day and this moment distinctly. It was our first summer together. 1986. I just graduated high school. We had just met in April. We were so content. So happy to simply sit there, all day. Together like that. When I asked J. what he remembers when he looked at this picture, he said - content. happy. in love. You can see it on our faces.

It also brings back a lot of thoughts and memories. At that point in my life - sitting there with the love of my life. Man - I had life by the tail! I was heading to college. Going to make something of myself. Getting out of this one horse town, as they say. Big dreams. I can remember at graduation, feeling as if there was nothing more important, or ever would be more important as that moment right then. Oh to be so niave as to think that once again. When you are 17/18 and facing the world diploma in hand, you feel invincable. So certain that every dream you have pocketed away, will soon be yours.

How many of those dreams are a reality in my life now? Oh so few so few. Save for my career, which has never faltered or changed,(Altho my path wthin my career has) and the love of my life( we have since moved this scene onto the couch every night), pretty much everything else has changed tremendously. I was never having kids. I was going to live in the city, be a huge metropolitan gal, riding the subway and spending weekends at the theater. Athletic training for one of the Philly teams. Oh yeah, I had it all planned out.

Funny though, as each dream, faded, and was replaced by a new more vivid dream - it didn't seem to matter. Funny though, as each dream took on a reality - as in settling back here in the country, rather than the city, and deciding to have the kids, I was still niave enough to think I knew exactly how the rest of my life would pan out. After I had the kids, I was certain I knew what they would become, and how they would grow. Oh how life has such different plans for us. I have been thrown my share of lilfe's curve balls, sometimes at my own hand, sometimes not. Part of true happiness I believe is learning that new and different dreams, or "altered" dreams as I like to think of them, are not any worse. Sometimes we can't appreciate our present bliss, because we spend too much time continuing to search and strive for something else.

I am presently living a life, nearly exactly opposite the one I planned for myself, all those years ago - I am happily married, with two kids, working with the elderly, in the country - digging gardens and weeding flower beds, and doing the "home for my kids to greet them at the door every night" thing, and I couldn't be happier. Interesting.

I will honestly say though, finally in my late thirties, for the first time in my life, I am not totally sure at all what the next ten years holds for me. The last ten have certainly been vastly different that I would have ever thought - but I can honestly tell say, my thirties have been some of the happiest years of my life. I have no idea what my 40's hold, but I can say - bring it on.

Yes, dreams change.

Thank goodness they do.

PS - just a note - that box sitting against the tree, is a lawn dart box...like I was talking about in my ladderball entry. Funny huh?

Ladderball

To answer some questions.... This is Ladderball.

Basically - you place these racks about 15 ft apart, and take turns trying to throw the "bolo" - which is basically a rope with a ball at either end - at the rack. The intention is to wrap the bolo around the rungs of the ladder and get it to stay there. Top rung is the most points, bottom the lowest. The kids are surprisingly good at it, and have not yet thrown the bolos are each other, which is always a good thing. Thankfully, the set Neena and Pappa sent to us has soft balls on the ends.
J and I did discuss building one, and I was researching patterns and rules when our gift arrived! So we are still enjoying it.
Simple backyard fun that does involved huge weighted darts or anything like that! Does anyone besides me remember those huge heavy lawn "jarts" - you threw them to try to get them to stick in the ground inside a colored plastic circle? Giant darts. We used to throw them up in the air high over our heads and watch them come down. I can not believe we survived our own childhoods!
When we were first married quoits was a big thing...kind of like horseshoes (which was also popular with my family when I was growing up) - but with circles. We even had permanent quoit pits set up at our first house. We never quite found "the" place for them at this house, that they wouldn't be in the way. We also had a permanent pole set up for volleyball at the other house. J had put PVC pipe, (wonder where he got that?) in the ground, and all we had to do was slip the volleyball poles into them and voila, net. Never got around to that here either, and now since the pool takes up a huge portion of the yard, that will most likely not be happening. I think we have slowed down a bit in our old age!