Melancholy

Bear with me for a moment of melancholy.

Today is grandparent's day at school. Every year creates a bit of a stir around here. Times like these even after 10 years, there is evidence of the huge gapping hole my mom's passing has left in our lives. Jim's parent's are just too far for these types of things, and the kids talk of my mom constantly when grandparent's day is coming. She would be there, with bells on. So each year, they take her picture with them. K always hated it and used to beg to stay home. If they make any projects we usually send them to J's parent's. I was doing ok this morning until C. was trotting across the yard today, photo in hand, and I said, "Have a good day!" - and his reply was, "With Nana by my side I can't fail!"

:::cry:::

So I am indulging in a small bit of self pity today. I don't allow it often. I much prefer focusing on the good things then dwelling on what can't be. I usually find some comfort in my routine, tidying and cleaning - but that wasn't working. So I went and had my breakfast out on the patio on this.... Our new swing! Which by the way was put together single handedly by me and my 11 year old! We rock baby! Put it down by the pond. Only draw back right now is that it is facing the neighbors house..so other than the pond, there isn't much view....so we will have to work on some arranging. I have also gotten three of the chairs and the new table put together. I will share a picture when it is all finished. I have to get tile for the table top. Of course, one of the chair pieces came out of hte box looking like it had been through WW2 so I called and am waiting for the piece to come. I am so proud of myself. I even went and got the socket set MYSELF and put those babies together! Wonder why I don't have a manicure! Hopefully this weekend we will get the new grill together and the canopy, then be rearranging and setting up the deck...meanwhile...

J. started on the railing on the pool deck. It is all up now. Just the gate and stairs to go, he has to get it done before we can open the pool because of the saw dust......if you notice C. and the neighbor boy under the deck playing. Too cute.
And feeling very Pioneerwoman-esque I took a picture of how I was helping yesterday. Keeping the contractor company. :::smile::: And watching him work.
And I am happy to say that cutting back on Zoey's activity has helped her limp very much. She is still out and about with us, trotting around and following us every where, but no more chasing her balls. If she runs too much , she still limps a bit but it is significantly better. Here she is yesterday sporting a new bandana, pink with paw prints. Such a sweetie she is.

Intersting site

Came across this at this website

http://www.thingsihavelearnedinmylife.com/

some interesting quotes there.

This one reminded me every time you look over yoru shoulder and call someone else a weird, most likely someone is looking over their shoulder at you saying the same thing.

*and if I didn't find something else to post I was going to post more about the patio furniture*

I *heart* my boys

be still my heart.

Darn these two are cute.

I don't think in all these years I ever tire of watching J. work. I was watching him through the window yesterday, with his shirt off. Watching him think, and move so sure of himself. So totally in his element. It is very sexy to me.

I am also quite excited that he finally retired his old "yard shorts" in favor of a new pair of cut offs. Those others were literally tatters, daring the neighborhood to a peep show if he wasn't careful.

C. has been the uber ultimate helper. He loves to help Daddy.

I am trying to play with my camera a bit and take some more interesting shots....I know I am not using this camera to it's capabilities.

My SIL also posted pictures om her blog of my nephew going to prom this weekend. They literally brought me to tears. I am not sure why. Well I know why, but it took me by surprise. He will be 18 this coming year, a senior in highschool, and it is so hard to believe. I am so totally proud of A. and the boy he has grown into. My brother and sister-in-law have done an amazing job of raising him. I may get her permission to snag the picture and post it here. He is such a smart, sweet, giving, yet sarcastically funny, playful kid. Love the Beatles and of course all things PlayStation and music related. He is going to do good things. I know it.

So ends another busy weekend.

I spent the weekend teaching of scrapping or spending time outside. OH - we have gotten all the patio furniture, etc....the boxes are all over the garage...so begins the major assembly of said pieces! I can not wait!

Horticultural goodness today

Remember those little green thumbs I posted about a few weeks ago?

Well here they are.

Each of them sprouting!

My broccoli is also up and my mouth is waiting for this basil to be big enough to cut. And if any of you have been reading my blog for a long time, you know I have posted about these before. First what they mean to me - they are the african violets I saved from my mom's house after she died. They were near death. I lost one, so have two left. I nursed them back to health, and I don't do indoor plants very well. They bloomed for the first time almost a year to the day of the anniv. of my m om's death. That was a sign to me. It has been nearly 10 years , and they were in desperate need of being transplanted and split. I however was petrified. But I did it!
Good Friday before we left for J's parent's I did it.
And they are still alive!

I am so relieved. I know they are just plants. But they mean a lot to me, and losing them would devestate me.

In other news...the construction projects never seem to end around here. This year it is a small deck on the pool. So here are the posts. C has been daddy's little helper. He is getting so mature. Knows what tools are needed, gets them himself. I offered he and K $2 each to rake the lawn for me yesterday since it was long when I mowed it the other night. He remembered yesterday, asked K if she was going to help - so he did the entire yard himself. No help. And proudly accepted the $4 for himself!

I am also trying not to get excited - but Home Depot and Lowe's are offering no interesting financing on credit charges until the end of the week. So we are pretty darn sure, and I say that cause J changes his mind often, that wwe are getting a new grill, patio set and canopy!! Woohoooo!

Will post about that I am sure!

Comments!

I have comments!
Love me some comments!

Keep 'em coming!

And I can not believe the number of people to come out of the woodwork in the last two days to tell me that they know someone, or are someone who has had ACL surgery for thier dog! Wow. I never even knew it existed until yesterday.

Today she is running in the yard with us - the weather here is gor-gus! But no rip roaring and tearing around....all the balls are put away...she is limping a bit but not as much as usual. So maybe we can get a few years outta this knee. Think I can invent a wee little doggie derotation brace that I can market and become a millionaire?

She is such a good dog. The quintessential man's best friend. More than happy to just be where we are, trotting after J pushing the wheelbarrow, laying the in shade where he is working, following the kids back and forth. She never goes far. Hate to see her hurting.

Just so.....

Well it seems our Zoey has a bad knee.

Took her to the vet today for her regular shots and check up.

Can I just say this dog LOVES that place. They love her. She is a gem on the table. Kisses the vet. And thinks it is some sort of playground! She of course was lavished with tons of "arent' you a good dog?" and "What a terrific dog she is" - we couldn't agree more.

I pointed out to the vet that she has been favoring her leg if she runs a lot, but seems better with some rest etc, and I held my breath waiting for her to tell me she had a bad hip. Well - turns out it is most likely her knee. Her ACL - wow. I know human ACL's....dog ACL's not so much,a nd they don't make little doggie braces like Randal Cunningham wears....so far she thinks it is only micro tears and maybe some joint arthritis from the injury. We figured out that most likely the injury has occured because one of Zoey's most favorite things to do is fetch sticks and balls - but at extrememly high speeds, and turning on a doggie dime when she gets to said fetching implement. Just like football players twisting, and tearing their ACL's , Zoey is twisting and injuring her knee. That is how fast and strong she is. Only thing is - the vet's recommendation - no more chasing and turning. What? No more? Not even cut back,let her rest? no more? Do you know how sad it was when she stood in front of me this morning, with her stick in her mouth, rear in the air in "get me mode" and I had to say no. But the up side is that saying no will lead to a longer happier healthier time for her. Hopefully with lots of rest and limiting the activity the limp will be less and less.

And it seems I am aging as fast as the dog. I seem to have approached as I push 40 the time in my life of pulling grey hairs. Yes, I said it, grey hairs. I admit it. It is out there. I have a few grey hairs. I have a *patch* coming in on my right temple, and few sprinkled in my part. I always thought I would never be the type to pluck. Ha! Those babies were outta there faster than you can say, Clairol. So it is also back to the salon for my spring highlights. I was trying to put it off...but I am having a hard enough time with fat and forty I don't need to add grey to it!

SO I color - Zoey limps - quite a pair we make!

PS - Report card day today. Holding our breath. Trying not to be tense but it is tough. Kaite is counting on it so much and is trying to be positive but I can tell she is worried. She is trying so hard.

Getting excited again

Did I mention that we were going to Universal on vacation?
Well - I should learn with my husband, never to do that.
You see - he doesn't settle to easily for the first decision.
So after weeks of my saying, you need to make a decision. We have to get reservations.
He/we - well let me rephrase that.....you see - I have learned while I suggest and discuss with him, the ulitmate decision has to be up to J. Otherwise if things are not *just the way* he likes/thinks they should be - he can make the trip miserable....he mopes, sighs....drives me nuts - so I have learned over the years to just let him be and make him *think* the final decision was his. Luckily, he does listen to me, and tries real hard.

Anyway - looks like we are headed to Pigeon Forge TN (Which was on my orginial list of places I wanted to go) - not to Dollywood, thankyouverymuch -
Hopefuly we are staying here - http://www.appleviewresort.com/ More Jim's style than a cabin in the woods, but still right on a river, so C can fish at will, there are canoes, rafts, pool etc...plus a hop and skip into Pigeon Forge. Although he was still spending hours on the computer last night *still looking* We are going to go Whitewater Rafting for a day! Woohoo!! That is what have been jonesin' to do for my birthday - just without a huge group of friends like I planned. It pretty much has everything we love about Myrtle Beach, without the beach. we get a gorgeous view of the Smoky Mts instead. I can only imagine the view from the river when we will be rafting. I will psuh hard for a day trip into Rocky Mt National Park but I think my whitewater day may be the only outdoorsy thing I get.....we'll see......I also came *this slose* to a day trip to the Biltmore in NC.....just not somewhere we want to drag the kids. May try to get over to see it the next time we visit my brother. It will be day trip for us, and hope my brother and SIL wouldn't mind the kids staying back with them...so that is an if...but I have always wanted to see it. Maybe Thanksgiving weekend when it is decorated for Christmas. What fun huh?

LAst night I had to giggle - K was acting very *teenager-y* at dinner last night...so J said , how about we have my parent's come down from blah blah date to blah blah date (I won't post the actual dates here) - to stay with the kids! and the dates were our vacation dates, ie - let's go alone! We did map out some places and things we would like to do if we ever get to go back alone.....there are some peaks and water falls i would love to hike and see, but til we can go back, I think I may be a bit too old for "strenuous" hiking.

So pray this is the end of the decision making and we have vacation plans!

4.12.08

Today started for me literally on barely two hours of sleep. Even took benedryl. Would love to say I was wide awake and accomplished a ton of stuff....but I was tired. Just could not GO to sleep. I felt restless, twitchy...right now I am dragging....

Luckily, this morning J had a "date" with the kids for breakfast and the flea market. C's wonderland! He wants to go back tomorrow. They both had their feet on the floor by 7:15. No arguements, no whining. I swear it is my grandfather's blood in him. Love to say I stayed home and slept in. Not the case. Still awake. This is how we spent the majority of the day. Jr Master's District tournament. K qualified this year. She rocked the first round, rolling a 158 I believe, and 144......
So, cool to wiat around and see her name on the advancing list. But then came the problem. Too much time waiting, led to too much time thinking about what else she would rather be doing. Realizing she had to get through yet another round to get the prize winning ball she was aiming for, another round to bowl against a girl who was bowling very well. And what did K do? Seh gave up...the first 5 frames of her next game. I could see it in her posture, I could see it in her swing..no effort what so ever. Trying not to seem like *one of those over coaching moms* but I had to talk to her.....I called her over, and she admitted to me. "I'll never do it mom. I want to be done. I can't beat her. " *tears in her eyes* Now mind you K had not advanced through the intial round last year, and had ROCKED the first qualifying. She was only one pin behind third place and 14 oinds behind second. She was in contention to at least make the final four to come back Sunday ...She was in second after the first game, and fell to fourth after the second, still able to pull it out...but she gave up. Her head was down. Her shoulders forward. I know the posture well. And if there is one thing they have learned about me, is mom does not condone quitting, giving up on yourself or the defeatest attitude. As soon as she doesn't feel *good enough* , she wants to fold. We wrestle and fight with that enough in school and learning. (and has been told by too many teachers that she CAN'T do things) There is no place in our fun for it. I dont' care if they win or lose, I will root for them all the way, but I will not allow them to give up on themselves....so I gave her the pep talk. Pointed out that she could pull it out. SHE WAS CAPABLE OF DOING IT. She perked up a bit late for the first game with was a 78. Not her best at all. But started relaxing, standing taller, rolling better, talking to the other girls, clapping for them, and bowled a 124 the second game. Much more her game. But alas, it was too late. The first game blew it for her. I praised her for changing her attitude and giving the last game her all. I was proud of her. If you have nothing else at the end of the day, no trophies no awards, to be able to say you gave it your all and didnt' give up on yourself means more to me than anything. That will take you far in life.
Now we are home for this.
First fire of the season.

There are few things I enjoy more than sitting by that fire in the dark, with a nice glass of wine, snuggled with J, watching the flames and listening to the spring peeps and the kids laughing somewhere playing in the dark. *sigh*

This year, not only does C get to help start the kindling. J is letting him put the big logs on the fire and tend to it. C is all over that ,let me tell you. Does the smile say he is proud of himself or what?

And he gets to wear the *fire gloves* - basically an old pair of leather gloves that J uses to push logs around etc....

My little pyro...he done good. We had a nice fire, some s'mores. Now a movie. Not a bad end to a good day. (Just don't get me started on some of the rude ignorant people you can run into at tournaments like we attended today)

Did see a funny t-shirt today that made me laugh -

It said.

I haven't lost my mind, I have it backed up on disk somewhere.

Just made me chuckle. Not sure why.

70 and Sunny

That was our forecast yesterday.

So who do we spend that kind of evening? C.'s favorite way - play light sabers/Star Wars in the back yard still wearing helmet from skateboarding earlier.
J's favorite way to spend the evening. Maybe K was dead on when she said the other day that she never really noticed Daddy's eye color cause his eye's were rarely open...hmmmm..maybe she is onto something.

K would not conscent to even a goofy picture...she has been playing a lot of street tennis with me....which is basically tennis just on the road and no net. Remember when you were a kid, and you were playing something in the street, everyone would yell, "car!" when they saw one coming, you would back up and nod at whomever was going past ? I think that is so timeless....

These guys - have just "woken" up in the last two weeks,and we started the waterfall...they have certainly fallen back into old patterns very quickly. All I have to do is show my face anywhere near the pond, and basically that means food. They come right on over. Basically one visit from the heron and that will stop. I am enjoyign it for now though. We also have a froggie friend, which Jim has dubbed "Fred" in the pond this year. So we are considering leaving some of the algae in for him.

K has her District bowling tournament tomorrow. Send good thoughts for lots of spares and strikes. And of course the rain is returning and the weather is turning cooler again. Won't be long now though til we are mowing and outside constantly.

Ode to 13

I am commiting blogger sin - a post with no photo.....I am sure I could find a recent one of K. but while on one hand she tells me she wants to go to ModelSearch and model - she refuses to be photographed without a silly expression on her face. ed- changed my mind - added this one - mostly for family's benefit. ::smile:: This is K. the sassy teenager nearly 12 years ago. So glad I scrapped it yesterday.

Like the title says, ode to being 13.

To knowing it all. (If I hear, "nu-uh" one more time when I try to say something, I may just scream!) Oh to be 13 again and know it all.

To being able to fly off the handle at a moments notice - and luckily having parent's with enough restraint not to grab her and shake her to death!

And to be able to calm down a few moments later, apologize and act silly.

To nothing being more important than your friends and the kind of cell phone you have. But lucky enough to have parent's who do remind you of what is important and how important some things will be in a few years.

As frustrated as I get with that girl. She is my girl. Our light. Our chatter-box. Our busy bee.

And I open my phone this morning - after a particular difficult week this week with *attitude*- to find my background screen is a silly grining photo of her she obviously took herself last night, and a new banner that says I < 3 Jim (that's a heart in cell language)

That is my girl.

Little Green thumbs

Anyone who knows me, knows how much I love to garden and play in the dirt. And if you would have asked me 15 years ago if that would be the case I would have laughed at you, as well as the thought of being happy being *just* a housewife and mom. But that is another topic all together.
One thing I love the most, is sharing my affection for seeds, plants and dirt with the kids. Enter - Target $1 spot! Loooove it. K and I picked up this littler starter pot sets the other night. I just have to laugh, no matter how old they are getting, they turn into such sweet little kids when it comes to doing this sort of thing. I wish I could have caught C's reaction when the little dirt *bullet* started to expand when he added the water. So K is growing strawberries(which she will never eat, but I give her the credit that she has tried one) and sunflowers on the window sill in her room. C is growing Zinnia, and sunflower inthe kitchen, as well as he helped me plant my basil.

We then took the extra seeds and planted them in egg cartons.

This is K's new *thing* - she only likes pictures of herself when she is making funny faces. Otherwise, she is *ugly* or *looks stupid* - so I told her I would post them anyway!

What else is going on around here?

I stepped into the 21st century and finally have a new cell phone. Gave up my Nextel - long story - suffice it to say after being with them over 10 years, I would tell anyone thinking about it, to go with someone else. 'nuf said. I now have a new shiny PINK razor...with REAL ringtones...right now I have Five O'clock somewhere on and It's a Love Thing for Jim's ringtone. K has spent more time playing with it and showing me how to use it over the weekend, then I have had time to play...so I am still learning. We went with Verizon - but ya know - there is no "network" outside on my lawn. Maybe I should call about that?

I can honestly say I think I have met one of the greatest parenting challenges yet - staying *interested* and listening intently as C recounts the entire history of Star Wars, and each cahracter that he is now learning about in a new book he is reading about the three SW movies that are yet to be made. I try I really do. I believe in giving my children an audience when they want to talk - but will admit, I feel myself glaze over more often then not. Hopefully he doesn't see it! Bet you didn't know Han Solo and Liea have three children - one dies, one is named Aniken, and one turns to the dark side. Learned that last night! So there!

Back to a full schedule at work this week. J is a happy man again. Coming off of C being sick for a week, me being sick for a week, then regrouping my schedule.

This weekend is K's next bowling tournament.

This week is the end of this quarter. Holding my breath. Haven't looked at her grades since mid-term. She is doing so well with her training and therapy. She SO wants to start to see her success in school. We do too. So pray for us on that one!