Life with a teenage girl

Hair.
The bane of existence for most females.
I don't think there are many that like their hair.
K absolutely hates hers.
And to her credit it does take a lot of time and product to tame those curls.
So - in November she had announced that
she was totally SICK of her hair and wanted to dye her entire head blonde.
Period.
No discussion.
She was going to WalMart and buying a dye kit and dumping it on her head.
Visions of Sun-In disasters from the 1980's flashed through my mind.
For this parenting moment, I went to bat. Drew a line in the sand.
But all my life experience and teaching could not deter her.
To say there was a "lively discussion" in our house that evening would probably be the understatement of the century.
I was very glad that my opinion and permission still mattered to her,
but it did not make saying no any easier.
But being a parent is not about being best friends.
There were a lot of tears.
There was a lot of ultimatums.
Then there was a compromise.
The agreement was, I would pay half of what we decide to do, if only she agree
to go to a professional.
And I would not be paying to maintain it.
Thankfully, we have a really young stylist that K seems to trust
and was on my side. (weehoo!)
The maintenance alone of dying her whole head was not even fathomable.
So Stacy talked her into chunky, VERY blonde highlights.
No problem.
It's only color.
Isn't orange or purple.
And made her happy.
And we thought it was a big deal.
We worked through it

Then comes the new year.
And again.
"I am SICK of my hair. "
She has always resented the time it takes to tame this mess every morning.
Can't say I disagree with her, but this is what God and her grandmother's genes gave her.
I am of the school of "learn to manage and live with it"...years of perming and coloring have taught me that you really can't fight mother nature.
But hey, what do I know!
So, now she decides it needs to go.
Well - I am the one that held her as she sobbed last summer
when she decided to go short and hated it.
I reminded her of this little fact.
Which is met with the oh so confident teenage, "So?"
"Ok - fine. So what you want", I say, "But don't expect me to hand you the tissues!"
(I actually prefer her with short hair. I think it highlights her face so nicely.)
So - off to the stylist we go again.
And she winds up with a reverse bob, that she
apparently "loves"...
Wheew.
Tears averted.

Ok, so now it is last week.....
Three weeks since the bob.
And once again.........
I hear,
"I want to cut my hair again"
OK, this time I do do a double take.
There isn't any going much shorter really.
So, once again...call the salon, and got the same reaction from Stacy....
"She wants to what? We can't really go much shorter", she says.......

But, apparently you can!
(with help from relaxer and a razor comb)
and inspiration from Halle Berry.....

And as severe as my reservations were.....
I love the results!
She loves it, or so she says for now!
She did say she wants to let the bangs grow in a bit.
I think she looks fabulous and can really rock the style.
She has been jazzing it up with skinny head bands and is thrilled now that she can wear some of her hats.

I have had my share of comments as in...
"How could you LET her do that?"
"Why didn't you stop her?"
"You could have said no"

But you know what.......
It is HER hair.
She has to live with it.
She has to love it.
It grows back.
(Although growing this in with her frizz and curl
is not going to be a pretty sight, but we will deal with that as we go)
She did not ask for
piercings.
Tattoos.
Five different colors.
She simply wanted it cut.
It was not about me wanting to be a lenient parent, or her best friend.
It is about letting her express herself as she wants to - within reason.
I dug my heels in on the blonde and insisted
that she go half way in January before she cut it all off.
She still wanted it cut.
and
it is HER hair.
Not mine.
She is soaking up the teasing she is getting from Daddy,
loves being told she looks like a model and looks beautiful.
She is holding her head higher and smiling a lot more.
And to me, that is what it is all about.
I think she is gorgeous.

Now let's see what February holds!