Sorry -

Didn't mean to leave y'all hanging.So before my blog dissolves into an Ode to Towels ~ which I would much rather journal about ~ I have to journal this , so 20 years (hopefully) from now, when K comes to me and says, Mom can you believe my baby girl is doing these things? I can so expertly pull out my blog journal and say, yup ~ here we are, wicca incident of 2008.
Yes, darling, I can believe your baby girl is putting you through all of this.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wicca In case you don't know what it is.
Basically, witchcraft.

The book - Wicca for Beginners - found by me. Yup. What bothers me more, BOUGHT while in the presence of her father. *sigh* I will not recount the conversation as he put it, but basically HE asked HER if MOMMY would be ok with it, and when the 14 YEAR OLD assured the ADULT that sure it would be ok with mommy, he said, ok why not. Hellloooooooooo!?!?! HE knows what it is. HE could have ended it right then or there, or redirected the converstation so that we could discuss it later and look into it WITH her. But no, once again, mom is the bad guy. Haven't had much chance to talk to K about it, as she sensed that it was touchy with me, and would not "talk" about it, she wanted an arguement. Got upset when I wouldn't give her an arguement, only rational conversation.

She claims curiosity.
OK - I can see that.
But she also at the age of 14, and faithfully fragile at best, does not need these ideas put into her head by a "How to" book. The ADULT in presence of buying this book could have handled it very differently.
It is our job as her parent, to guide, teach, encourage her curisity but also up front present to her our belief in what is basically not good for her. Period. Had she come to me and said, mom I saw this book and was wondering what it was....I would have sat down with her and the wonderful internet and explored it. But dh did not allow for that. It is now an ISSUE. Making it even worse.

I always assumed, yeah there is that word, raise your kids in a christian home, in church and that path they shall follow. I was not raised christian, WISH I had known my faith and God at 14. But that was not the case. K is fragile at best in her faith. Understandable at her age. Her therapist also discovered a deep anger at God for my mom's death when K was 4. Apprantly she still carries a lot that around. She is very good at blaming God for the bad stuff but not very good at thanking him for the good stuff. I know she didn't get that from me. So we are working through all of that in the mean time. I know I can not make her believe. That is up to her and I certianly pray every day that she can let God's love in, and feel the peace even in the rough times. Lord knows it has gotten me through some pretty rough moments in my life. (one of which being the reent urge to murder my husband!)
And in the meantime I do not need things like Wiccan philosophy muddy-ing the waters any more.